dreams, responsibilities….

we always have to juggle between what we want to do, and what we have been asked to do..

what we want to do could be termed as a dream, and what we have been asked to do could be deemed a responsibility..

i have always dreamed about what i wanted to do, and pursued my dreams, but at this stage of life, i am not so sure i could continue on this path, to carry on dreaming.. well, i am sure many people would jump at me readily, give me a slap, and tell me it’s about fucking time u realised the reality in life..

but i have steve jobs on my side? in his book on the innovation secrets of steve jobs, he encourages people to keep dreaming! and i have a billionaire encounter, i meant an encounter with a self-made billionaire from scratch, and he told young people to keep on dreaming, and to start young and follow all your heart, dreams.. the last i know, he has 800million liquid assets.. bloody hell.. that’s 8 zeros!

here’s another steve job’s quote; passion won’t guarantee that you would not fail, but passion would make sure that no failure would ever stop you!

ok, that’s the dream part, what are the responsibilities that i have to juggle with?

there’s a chinese saying, 百善孝为先， meaning, the biggest kindness is to be fillial.. and that’s why, kindness has no boundaries and needs no money, even the poorest can be the most kind..

ok, back to 百善孝为先, my dad wants me to settle down so badly, that it is becoming like a tape recorder repeating it’s mantra of me finding a wife and settling down, and with it comes responsibilities.. i suppose with that, one has to sacrifice a lot of dreams..

maybe i should get a dreamer, as a partner.. ha!

what a crude joke..

i am searching for a breakthrough on this conundrum..

timely reminder,.. thank you

Jealousy and pride can be tricky and are difficult to recognize; they sometimes manifest as a subtle feeling of dislike. For instance, when someone tells you how great you are, you feel good about it. But then the person continues, “You are great, but he is still better.” Then a feeling of discomfort arises.  When others are praised, we do not like to hear about it. When these subtle thoughts of jealousy and pride remain unrecognized, they grow into overwhelming emotions that cling to one’s own happiness and to hostility toward others. The root of all this is the grasping at a self. Because we strongly believe in this self, we feel alarmed by everything that threatens it. When others criticize us, we get angry.

In fact, when others blame you, they cannot add a fault to you that you do not possess. When others praise you, you are not becoming a greater person because of that. Whatever others say about you does not affect your faults and qualities. Only you can see whether you have this fault or not. If you do not have the fault for which you have been accused, there is no need to be upset, since criticism does not make you have the fault. If you do have that fault for which you have been accused, then the person pointing it out to you becomes your kind teacher helping you to improve. Dzogchen Patrül Rinpoche said, “Never look at your own qualities, but never look at others’ faults. Always look at your own faults, but never look at others’ faults.”

It is important to recognize each and every subtle arising of jealousy and pride. This requires a great deal of diligence in mindfulness, as these emotions in particular are very difficult to identify. Whenever such a thought arises you must apply a method to abandon it. Ideally you eliminate it through recognition: if you have trained your mind in mindful awareness you will see the thought the moment it arises and recognize its empty nature. If you recognize this, this thought is rendered powerless. It will not affect you in one or the other way. If your mindfulness is not yet strong enough you can apply the bodhisattva approach, considering that the other person is your mother, your best friend, your child, and therefore give rise to love and compassion for them.
And if this is too difficult in a certain circumstance, you can apply the pratimoksha approach, and that is to contemplate the faults of this emotion, understanding that as a result of acting on such an emotion you will fall into the lower realms. You should apply one of these three approaches according to your mental capacity in the moment of affliction. You have to practice according to your capacity, just like a child must wear children’s clothes and an adult wears adult’s clothes. A child in an adult’s cloak would be troubled. In brief, Lord Buddha summarized, “Perfectly tame your own mind; this is the Buddha’s teaching.”

Rigpa Glimpse of the Day

A human being is part of a whole, called by us the ‘Universe,’ a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings, as something separated from the rest—a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circles of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty.

 

ALBERT EINSTEIN

not knowing enough, more information always needed?

i have some business plans and some potential business partners, and recently, it has progressed to a stage where we are going to incorporate a company..

being an analyst, i want to know there is everything to know about my potential partners before going into an agreement with them, afterall, settting up a company together is easier, it’s the breaking up part that is messy.

i was really obsessed about whether my potential partners are of the right type.. are they honest? with integrity? diligent? clean? etc..

i really was going around in circles without a definite answer to those, and so i approached my guru, and i wanted my guru to guide me and tell me if i should go into partnership with them..

my guru came back with a very simple reply;

if your partners have the same objectives, then just have faith and learn to deal with ups and downs of being involved in businesses.. there will be ups and downs, guaranteed,.. there is no need for you to know their background that much, each people has their own dark secrets that they don’t want to let other people know.. and there is really no point in you knowing into that kind of minor detail..

it is the same with being in a relationship, being in a relationship, as long as the couple both have the same objectives, then just go with it and learn to deal with the ups and downs of being involved in a relationship..

those words are truly words of wisdom, in our age, we have learnt to disassociate ourselves from downs, we tend to want to not get involved in bad things, and can’t stand the sight of bad things, so much so that we have become control and intellectual freaks, that we have lost the ability to learn how to deal with ups and downs.. or that we have learnt that the only way to deal with bad things is to not have it in the first place? if we don’t learn how to deal with downs, and only know how to deal with downs is to not have them in the first place, then, we would devoid ourselves with more and more things in the long run!

why have we come to this point? where we only know how to deal with freaking ourselves out with the outer, but lost focus that it’s the inner that we have to learn? this self-precious ego thing is suffering!!

thanks guru.. dealing with the inner and learning how to manage myself in ups and downs of the society and relationships, and be faithful with people is more important than knowing everything there is to know..

to be on top of matters is not to know every little minute detail out there that there is to know, and be an intellectual and control freak..

to be on top of matters is simply to manage yourself well on the inner and the outer situation will then be well.

Protected: wkend acrossed towns

This post is password protected. To view it please enter your password below:

Password:

i love that man..

if you have been around ss2, the neighbourhood where i live in, around noon time, if you walk around the row of shoplots where public bank, murni the mamak is located, you must have seen a man sitting in his wheelchair, wearing a cap.. he is often around the entrance of public bank..

he has a small frame, but you could see that it is some kind of growth issue, and his neck is bend towards his right shoulder, with his head always sorta resting on his right shoulders.. and i think he could be in his 40s? he has a size of a 8-9yr old kid..

he sells pen. he’ll never ask passer-bys to stop by to have a look.. but when you stop for a minute and ask him how much he is selling those pens (RM10 per packet with 4 pens), he would greet you with a smile and tell you cheerfully how much they costs.. and if you buy a packet of pen from him, he would remind you, with his soft spoken voice, that you have to remove that plastic at the pen’s writing tip, so that you can start using them..

i did buy from him, it was about a year ago, and after i bought from him, he would say thank you, and back to continue reading his book.. i caught a glimpse of the book he was reading, he was reading the bible..

that was quite a while ago, and i had completely forgotten about it until tonight, when after work and some exercise, i went to the night market to get some dinner, it was around 10.30pm..  when i saw that man again, my heart completely fell..

he was sitting beside a stall of people selling dvds, in his wheelchair, selling pens.. he must have been so tired sitting under the sun the whole day, when i were there, he was sleeping, head resting on his right shoulder, he must been exhausted, but there he is, still there at 10.30pm in the night selling pens to make that extra penny to earn a living..

i felt so so sad, there are honest people out there with a heart of gold trying to make a living! and it’s not easy for them at all! they have no place to be.. even into the late hours of the night..

what’s wrong? i ask myself, what’s wrong?? something must have been missing here, somewhere..

sometimes, they are times in life when you slow yourself down, let your guard off completely, and out of nowhere, you meet this kind of heart wrenching yet wonderful moments, and you realize, there are times like these where moments changes your life..

it’s love that’s needed, and it’s love that’s ever been needed all along…

spread the love, get started with giving out moments of random kindness in your life today..

much work

when you start to look within yourself, that’s when you start to learn about humility, and you’ll realize that happiness and peace of mind is so precious..

people on the street, in any walks of life, could be the ambassador of such a treasured quality, and if you’re too engrossed with yourself, too egoistic, you actually miss all these perfectly moments, everyday, passing you by..

and so, if these perfectly moments are passing you by every minute of every day, it only means you are encapsulating yourself in this bubble of .. yourself? self-denying yourself with moments of bliss everyday..

how often you want something so much, and you start to visualize yourself how happy you’ll be when you have it, but when the ‘real’ moment comes, you find yourself somehow not that elevated?

and how often, when you let your guard down, and go around with an opened state of mind, that you see amazing things happening everywhere, with everyone?

there are people out there who are great keepers of these unsurpassable teachings, and who are at the same time, completely humble and down to earth.. have you had the good karma of ever encountering one?

life is very short indeed, when you get older, the fragility of life starts to reveal itself ever more and more..

grasping is one of the surest habit that breeds suffering…

i have so much work in this field to work on..

quote from Thomas Merton

Thomas Merton (January 31, 1915 – December 10, 1968) was a 20th century Anglo-American Catholic writer..

“The beginning of love is to let those we love to be perfectly themselves,
and not to twist them to fit our own image,
Otherwise we love only the reflection of ourselves in them.”

you’re loved, JUST THE WAY YOU ARE !!

do you have someone that you love, just the way they are?

don’t stop looking around, but look inside rather than outside of yourself…

see where you’re going

let the universe, the vast space of phenomena be our teacher..
and the universe ambassador’s essence of conduct and knowledge, is my guru..

lama khyen! lama khyen! lama khyenno!!

first half marathon

didn’t know, think i was crazy a few months back, but i signed up from the penang bridge 21km half marathon on the 21st nov 2010..

Uncle Barry drove me to the road opposite the starting point at Queensbay Mall around 2am, and i was watching liverpool play west ham at a cafe located just beside the starting point while having 4 bananas within that hour of preparation time i had there..

they say that you should do a light jog to warm up before the run, but what the heck, i’ll save every ounce of energy for the actual run itself! my target was to complete, it was afterall, my first half marathon.. (and it started at 3am!)

after a rain soaked run that lasted 2hr 57mins, i completed my first half marathon! with occasional threats of cramp for the last 7km, munching some rain soaked buns at half distance, and some ice packs and deep heat sprays along the way..

i must had completely utilized every single unit of carbo/protein/fat from the food binging that i had in penang!! well done!

they say it’s rare an opportunity to take photo on penang bridge.. this was taken halfway through the run after turning round on penang bridge, just before it started pouring!